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Let Go while keeping the memories alive


I donated my mom’s favorite dress to charity a few months after her passing. I now have a sense of how my clients feel when they give away items once treasured by a loved one. I didn’t treasure or even like my mom’s special dress, but she loved it more than any other article of clothing she owned because this dress was worn to many celebrations. When she spotted it in her closet it would trigger wonderful memories of those occasions, even after some of her short-term   memory was lost. 

Dad referred to the dress as “slinky” and thought she looked smashing in it. It was black, floor length, and sparkly. Slinky was mom’s beloved dress for more than a decade and was a symbol of joy. She wore it as she danced with my dad at their 50th-anniversary party!

Once I donated the dress, I was surprisingly OK, even though I felt a lost a bit more of my mom.  I still have my personal memories of my mom and I treasure those more than the physical stuff. 

If you are having trouble letting go of items left behind by loved one, I have a suggestion; keep the items that are the most meaningful and bring you the most joy.  Display and enjoy those items.  Allow yourself time to grieve, keeping in mind that grieving and its timeframe is different for everyone, then start letting go of the other things little by little. 

I’m frequently reminded of my mom because I chose to keep and wear her birthstone ring.  It fits my finger perfectly and is extra special since we share the same birthday month.

Only you know what items are truly precious to you and deserve to be kept and treasured.  Take some time to reflect, decide, and let go.


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